WE NEED TO CARRY EACH OTHER

So much has happened this week around the world.  I’m not political by nature, at least not in the way this country sees it.  I have this crazy notion that you can talk to others even if you have a different point of view and it doesn’t have to become a screaming match.  I’m also an independent.  I live in the center; I believe in compromise and understanding.  Sometimes here, those things sound like dirty words.  

I used to live in Orlando, for a few years.  I worked at Disney World during that time.  That whole area was one of the most accepting and open places I have ever lived.  

In the span of a week, 49 souls who just wanted to go out, dance and have a good time were taken from this world. “Folks the rest of us won’t get to know”.  An innocent boy died in a tragic accident.  A politician who by all accounts that I could find was trying to make her country a better place was senselessly murdered. 

It’s just…its a lot.  

So, I’ll just leave you with this.  It helped me a little, maybe it will help you:

CATHARSIS

How many people come here to read this?  I’m not really sure.  Really it doesn’t matter, that’s not why I write it.  I started writing this blog because I wanted a place to explain how the bands music has affected me and how thankful I am for having it in my life.  

I think of that and I just remember when I was 12-13 years old and I would come home and be so upset, I could be on the verge of tears, so I would go over to the stereo, put my disc of The Joshua Tree in, and my headphones in the jack, and I would play ‘One Tree Hill’. With my eyes closed, the pain and emotion in that song would flow through me and wash all of mine away.  

If that was the only thing that their music had ever done for me, that would be enough, but its been there for me so many other times, in good times as well as bad.  

So this past week I was wondering wether or not if I should keep writing because I was dealing with a little bit of my depression creeping in.  Then I thought about this. So I’ll keep writing.  

TGFA- THANK GOODNESS FOR ADAM

I just want to take this opportunity  say thank goodness for Adam embracing the band’s social media accounts.  He has by far posted the most recently, and just last week gave us an about 20 second clip of a new song. It seems like at least once a week there’s a post that either Check out this art or This is my view today (pic of fascinating location) or my favorite recent one was where he missed his flight and grabbed a stand by coach seat.  

My mom has thought that Bono is my favorite because I talk about wishing about meeting him.  Well, he has the highest meeting probability, at least that’s what I assume.  Bono’s usually the one out there that everyone sees, but hey, he’s the frontman, that’s kinda his job, right?  Truth is, I don’t have a favorite member of the band, I don't think I could.  Adam though, he’s just so cool.  But coolness though, its a state of mind.  He’s cool because he’s comfortable in his own skin, he’s open and relaxed.  I aspire to be like that some day; I’m working towards it.  I may never achieve Adam level coolness, but one can hope.

So thank goodness for Adam, for taking us fans on the journey with him.  

FOR MEMORIAL DAY

Today is Memorial Day in the United States of America (a holiday originally called Decoration Day, and set aside to remember those who died in service to the country and those that served in the military).  There was a passage in Bill Flanagan’s book U2 At The End of the World that came to mind yesterday when I was thinking about today, and it had to do with the performances of  ‘Bullet the Blue Sky’ and ‘Running to Stand Still’ during the Zoo TV tour.  Bono played them as a soldier in a war zone.  Specifically, he played them as Jerry Mele, their head of security from 89-97.  I remember watching it and feeling the power of the performance, but then reading that and finding the story behind it, it gave it a whole new aspect to it.  

If you don’t know anything about Jerry, look him up, he was an interesting man. Even if you just read about him in Flanagan’s book, that will give you a glimpse. Sadly, while doing his job for the band during the PopMart tour in Mexico City, Jerry was badly beaten and had to retire.  He passed away last month.  

Rest in Peace Jerry Mele. 

THE TALE OF THE ANGELS

          

This image kind of has a life of its own.  The original is the framed one, which is an etched print I had made for a printmaking class in college in winter/spring 2001.  At the time, I had these angel themed songs going through my head, ‘If God Will Send His Angels’ was a big one, but I was also hearing Robbie Williams’ ‘Angel’ (don’t judge).  This image formed in my mind and when we had an assignment to do two metal plate etchings-one just with tools, one with an acid and a medium to impede it- I decided that this was the chance  to finally make that piece.  For me it turned out, well, alright.  Its not fantastic but its ok.  The feeling is definitely there.  

Now normally with me that would be it.  I got the piece done (wether it be artwork, writing, what have you) and when I’ve gotten it out of me and out in the world (so to speak) then its done and I’m not thinking about it, or trying to figure out how to change it, etc.  I kept thinking about this one.  I would practice drawing the figures over and over in sketchbooks.  

So three years pass and How To Dismantle An Atomic Bomb comes out and they announce the dates for the Vertigo tour.  For once I have some money saved because I’m working at a job that actually paid me more than minimum wage (sadly, it was temporary, but it was one of the best I had.).  I knew I could afford to see them more than once.  I really wanted to make something to give to them in the off chance I would be able to meet one of them outside of the venue.  When I tried to figure out what I wanted to make, this image came to mind yet again, because really, it spoke perfectly how their music has affected me.  

So I started working on a new version.  Its black Canton drawing paper and white Prismacolor pencil (which are an oil based artists colored pencil.  They are fantastic, a little pricey but fantastic.).  I worked on it for months just trying to get it to look perfect, and hoping to give it to one of them at the concert I was going to see that May in 2005 (May 14 in Philadelphia).  My close friend from college Ana was coming down to go with me to the show.  We had seats instead of GA so I thought maybe we’d have a chance?  Yeah, it wasn’t to be, but the show was great, as was the Vertigo Tour, in my humble opinion.  We also had a great time. ‘Yahweh’ and ’40’ live are something special, let me tell you.  

Anyway (boy I use that word a lot) the picture was still in my possession.  It actually lived in my car, hidden behind my front seat where the sun couldn’t fade it, for months.  Then the news came that the boys were coming around again to Philly in the fall, so I got another ticket.  This time it was GA (general admission).  This was the first time I was ever going to a concert by myself, and yeah, I was a little nervous about that.  One downside was that I had to work and then church beforehand so there was no getting in line early, an upside was that I had made some friends in the Zoo (Zootopia fan community part of u2.com.   Other than the ones that I’ve received permission from, I’m only going to refer to them by their usernames.).  One in particular Sectionbgirl97 (or SBG) and I started talking to each other before the show a bit and she said she would save me a spot in line since she was going by herself as well.  There was also Teresa (Miss Recee) and ServoU2 and one of the sweetest people ever, the late Noreen that I met up with when I got there and I brought provisions to.  I figured if I couldn’t get there when the 4 of them did, the least I could do was bring drinks and snacks.  I’m still good friends and in contact with Recee.  

I explain all of this because it goes along with the rest of the story about the picture.  Sectionbgirl and I stuck together, because she was the one with the number for our place in line, and she said she knew where to go to see if the band had gotten to the venue yet.  I thought that was cool so we went.  While we were standing over there she saw another friend she had and her father (unfortunately I don’t remember what her name was, but this was 11 years ago.).  I wound up seeing Joe O’Herlihy drive past and I fangirled a little (because I guess I’m that kind of a fan.  But hey, he’s been their sound guy FOREVER so I was just like IT’S JOE!).  

That’s not where the night got weird though.  And when I say weird, I mean “Did I just step into the twilight zone?” type of weird, because really, things like this don’t usually happen to me.  See, SBG got her name because that was where she was sitting when she got pulled up on stage to dance with Bono when she was at a U2 show.  She’s been to a number of shows and has actually met Bono’s minder during the show and the tour’s usual head carpenter, not to mention the Bono’s cousin, AJ Rankin. Now, I don’t know if he actually remembered her when she walked up to him or if he was just being nice, but he did stop to talk to her.  Then she called both her other friend and the girl’s father as well as me over.  Yup, my anxiety kicked in because I gave a polite hello but I couldn’t talk after that, I just kind of awkwardly stood there with my matted picture in my hand (I didn’t have it framed, but I did have it matted.) SBG’s other friend, bless her, didn’t have my social issues and was much more talkative.  She had an envelope she wanted to give to Bono with info about money a group she was involved with had raised for an African charity. 

 This is where I have to really talk about how wonderful and kind Mr. AJ Rankin is.  When she asked if he could take it back for her, he was a little iffy about it, and he said that she wouldn’t get it back.  She said it was ok, she didn’t want it back.  He’d said something to the effect of that he really shouldn’t, but it was only something small so he would do it.  He then looked over at the silent one of the group (aka me) and saw the picture in my hand.  The following interaction went something like this.

AJ: “That’s beautiful.”

Me:(sounding like a dork) “Thanks, I made it for the band.”

SBG’s friend: “She doesn’t want it back either!”

At that moment I was like ‘OMG what is happening, because I’m actually shaking as I hand it over to him because he said he’d take it back with him too. There was a note attached to the picture, but I never put any email or contact info on it (maybe not the smartest idea, but its not like I’d actually hear back from them anyway if they saw it).  I feel indebted to him now.  

So that’s the story of the angel.  I haven’t tried to go back to the image again.  I don’t know if I’m done with it or not.  Time will tell I guess.  There are always images I go back to that I tinker with, I guess this is one of them.  The meaning behind it is definitely one of the reasons why.  

SOME DAYS ARE BETTER THAN OTHERS

Some days are better than others.  Sometimes some weeks, months, years…well, you get the picture.  This is probably the quickest of these stories/essays that I’ve written.  And the title has more than one meaning. I’ve been trying to put out one of these once a week, usually on a Saturday.  It was good for me to have a set schedule.  It wasn’t so easy this week.

It has been raining nearly non stop for the past two weeks where I live.  When we finally had two non raining days in a row, I was able to get out and mow the lawn that was starting to look like we were trying to grow hay.  So either my headaches were amped up because of the weather or  exerting myself sucks all the energy out of me.  Six to one, half dozen to the other.  In fact, I was out earlier today mowing again (we have 4 acres here). But anyway, that’s life.  I’m not saying any of this to make you feel bad for me.  There are millions upon millions of people in this world who have it worse than I do.  I was just explaining why I was late this week.  

I have to tell you, though, Zooropa has been one of my favorite albums since it came out.  It was one of the first albums I was able to buy right after it came out.  I even remember the record store where I bought it.  It was down the shore in Ocean City, New Jersey (USA) on their boardwalk.  The place was called Tunes on the Dunes and you could find new releases and rare little gems (like when I procured the Desire single.).  Its a shame privately owned places like that aren’t really around anymore.  I miss that place.  

But to get back on topic, I was totally into Zooropa the first time I heard it.  To me, it was almost as if I was Alice and it was my Wonderland and I could go there every time I listened to it.  Almost every song was a filled with these bright or crazy color combinations (the CD and album artwork didn’t hurt in creating that illusion.  Kudos to the graphic designers).  I loved nearly every song (I was a little iffy on Daddy’s Gonna Pay for Your Crashed Car at first) since the first listen.  

And that’s where we get to Some Days are Better Than Others.  The album came out in July 1994, and so I was just shy of turning 14 (2 months away) and when I heard that song I once again thought ‘Yes! They understand what its like to be me!’ because as we all know 13 was never a great age for anyone.  And trust me here, anyone who thinks they have it all figured out when they are a teenager is either lying to themselves are really naive.  Either that or they are one of those super geniuses that invent something when they are like, 11 and make millions of dollars and then can do whatever they want to for the rest of their life, but that almost never happens.  

You try to find the good days within the bad and when you don’t want to get out of bed, kick yourself out and do it anyway.  I have to do this almost every day.  

Some days are better than others.

Thank you

For this blog's 100 views.  It's all because you decided to come back again to read what I posted.  Thank you.