So...

Did anyone else watch Bono on Charlie Rose last night?

I may be biased (yeah, ok I am, I'm not ashamed to admit it), but an interview with him is always good to me.

I can't say I disagreed with anything he really said there (I don't actually know Secretary Clinton, so I'm going to have to go with him on that one, since he actually does know her.).

In case you didn't see it, or you don't get the show where you live (I apparently have someone reading this in France, merci, and I know Cris is in Romania, and quite frankly I'm technologically challenged enough to not know if they stream the show when it airs here in the States) here is a link from Charlie Rose's own website:

Bono on Charlie Rose

SOMETIMES YOU CAN'T MAKE IT ON YOUR OWN

Tomorrow is my 36th birthday.  I don’t say that to try to get a comment or anything, its just to show you where I’m coming from.  

There have been a lot of times when I have been thinking about my biological father, and there’s been a number of recent instances that have brought him to mind.  One of which was an old friend of his coming up to my mom and me after church to say hello and tell me that I look just like him.  To say I was speechless was an understatement (especially considering we haven’t lived in our old neighborhood where we did when Dad died since 1989.  Dad died 30 years ago this December.).  Anyway, because of this there has been more than once when I’ve felt guilty that I’m not spending the same time on my step-dad, who died 4 years ago.  

I knew my step dad better than my dad.  I love them both very very much, but in different ways.  And yeah, there are probably more than one song that reminds my of my dad, but SYCMIOYO in a lot of ways, that one belongs to my step dad.  

We didn’t fight that much.  We had a few arguments at first, but I think that was more a getting to know you thing, and we always apologized…usually about ten minutes later…and it was usually me because I was the one in the wrong.  You know how with teenagers things can happen.  God bless him, he’d never dealt with girls before, so he was learning as he went.  Luckily most of this never happened when my mom was around.  

Tough, you think you've got the stuff

You're telling me and anyone

You're hard enough 

That was one thing about him, though.  He was so very stubborn.  In that case, he fit in well in my family because all of us are really (some more than others).  But really, the lines that really hit home in the song, that remind me of him when I hear it are these:

Let me take some of the punches

For you tonight

Listen to me now

I need to let you know

You don't have to go it alone

and then these:

And it's you that makes it hard to let go 

Sometimes you can't make it on your own

Sometimes you can't make it 

The best you can do is to fake it

Sometimes you can't make it on your own

See, he died in 2012 of a stroke at age 87, almost 88.  He just fell asleep in his chair before lunch.  Mom was in the kitchen making sandwiches, and I was sitting on the other side of him.  She called over to him to wake him up so we could eat, and he didn’t.  We kept trying to, but he wouldn’t wake up.  That’s when we called for an ambulance.  He spent over two weeks in the hospital, but he never woke up, and when they did a scan they found out there had been a number of small clots that had gotten to his brain at some point during the whole thing too, not just the initial stroke.  My mom is in the hospital every day.  I was there every day I could be there (there were some days I had to be at home because we had renovations that were being done that had been planned way before everything had happened.).  I hated seeing this man who never looked or acted his age lying there dying in a hospital bed, but I couldn’t not be there.  

There was another thing too…I’d never actually been in the room when someone died.  I won’t lie, that scared the crap out of me.  I don’t know why, I mean, I’ve dealt with and been around death before.  I mean, I’m Irish-I’ve been to more funerals than weddings in my life.  That being said, I had never been in the room when someone’s life had ended, especially someone that I loved.  But you know what?  It was peaceful, for him at least.  And I was able to say goodbye at the end.  

I wouldn’t be who I am or where I am if it wasn’t for my step dad.  I hope he knew how much I loved him.  My mom says he did.  I hope she’s right.  

So, I finally started my personal blog.

If anyone from here wants to check it out, here the link:

A Wonderer's Notes

Hey all, I'm still here

Once again, I had every intention of posting something last week, but life got in the way again.

So my family went down the shore (which for those that aren't from South East Pennsylvania means the beaches of Southern New Jersey, which are filled with little island resort towns.).  We've been doing that since I was a baby.  Two days before going down I had my second round of Botox injections for my chronic migraines.  So far its not working, but the Dr said that it could take up to three rounds to really take effect.  We'll see.  The wifi that was at the place we rented was a little wonky, but then again, the extender at home has been acting up to so who knows.

OF course while I was off there has been a lot action in the U2 world.  A new song (or a version of) has been heard, and if you haven't caught it yet, get over to youtube before it gets taken down.  I really like it!  Its got a great beat and I'm digging the lyrics I could make out.

Also a very happy anniversary to Bono and Ms Ali.  May we all be lucky enough to find a love like yours in our lives.  (Yes, I know they will never read this, but I still wanted send the happy vibes out into the universe, so to speak).

And of course, lastly, the rumors are that the new album, Songs of Experience, will be out in either September or October.  Selfishly I'm hoping for the middle of September because that's when my birthday is, but really, whenever it comes out, I'll be happy.

Now, as just a side note, when people judge too harshly on new music that they hear.  I was out doing yard work that needed to be down way before when I was doing it, and I was listening to my music library on random while working.  Now, if I had to pick a least favorite U2 album, I guess it would be NLOTH, just because its the one I listen to the least.  I don't dislike it though, and it doesn't contain the one U2 song actually don't like (that's actually on one of my favorite albums, Pop.  The song is Miami, BTW, but that's something else).  Anyway, a song starts that I at first don't immediately recognize, and I said to myself, "hmm, that melody is pretty."

The song was White as Snow.  I probably hadn't heard that song in over a year, and suddenly I had a whole new appreciation for it.

(And just so you know, I've given Miami multiple chances...for some reason, I still don't like it.)

So, you know, that album you didn't like, or that song that you just didn't vibe with that first time you heard it, give it another listen.  You might change your mind.  You might not, but you never know.

Next post should be coming much sooner, and its a really lighthearted one.  Its also a wee bit embarrassing for me, but you know, that's a part of life.

More Love More Peace

I’ve rewritten this a few times now, and each time I delete it all because it just doesn’t sound right, or it isn’t coming out right.  This summer, and much of this year has been plagued with stories of shootings and massacres, of violence against others that are feared or touted as different from one group or another.  Hate has been rhetoric of choice.

It shouldn’t be.  

“Love drives out all fear”

“Love makes strange enemies

Makes love where love may place

The soul in its striptease

Hate brought to its knees”

“I’ve seen for myself

There’s no end to grief

That’s how I know

That’s how I know

And why I need to know that there is no end to love”

One of the things I always loved about U2’s music was the light that was inside of it.  Even in the darkest one, there was always a small spark.  It always helped me through my darkest times…but you already know that, I’ve mentioned it more than once.

Not long after what happened in Orlando, one of my friends down there, Del Marco, who works in the media industry, wanted to try to get something started to combat all the negative emotions that have been swirling around.  He thought about starting a rally, first online, and then hopefully getting one in person called #MoreLoveMorePeace.

He wants to get the message out that its shouldn’t matter what your color or creed or sexual orientation or anything like that is, that we should all love each other.  And, I don’t want to put words in his mouth, but, if we all love each other, then why would we be fighting against each other than?  Why would we be throwing all of this hate at each other?  And, in there, is the More Peace.

I thought it was a great idea, and in some small way I wanted to help.  So I told him (all over Facebook) that I would try to come up with a logo if he would like.  It wasn’t much that i could do, but I guess it was something.

There is an old saying that goes “Better to light a candle than curse the darkness.”

I’m really hoping that this candle burns very bright indeed.

BEAUTIFUL DAY

I have been trying to finish the entry that I wanted to post over a week ago, and haven’t been able to, when I was out to do my weekly chore of mowing the lawn.  I brought my iPod with me this time, and started a random playlist.  The second song to play was ‘Beautiful Day’ and I just had this wave wash over me.  

Now, I’ve heard this song a million times; I even know all the words to it, but that other day I could really feel it.  There are so many times when I feel so lost-between my illness and not knowing when or if the headaches will ever be controlled, and if they are, what happens after.  I know there are a lot of people who have it a lot worse than I do.  I never want anyone’s pity or anything like that, but I can’t help that there are times when I have these feelings.

That day that I was out mowing was a beautiful day; it wasn’t too hot and wasn’t too cool, which is rare for a July in Pennsylvania.  The sky was a bright blue with barely any clouds and the humidity was low, it was almost a perfect day, weather-wise. I was able to stop and actually look around and admire that. 

Sometimes, its nice to be reminded that its ok to not have all the answers.  Its ok to just take it one day at a time, and occasionally take delight in the beauty God gives you in a perfect summer day.  

WE NEED TO CARRY EACH OTHER

So much has happened this week around the world.  I’m not political by nature, at least not in the way this country sees it.  I have this crazy notion that you can talk to others even if you have a different point of view and it doesn’t have to become a screaming match.  I’m also an independent.  I live in the center; I believe in compromise and understanding.  Sometimes here, those things sound like dirty words.  

I used to live in Orlando, for a few years.  I worked at Disney World during that time.  That whole area was one of the most accepting and open places I have ever lived.  

In the span of a week, 49 souls who just wanted to go out, dance and have a good time were taken from this world. “Folks the rest of us won’t get to know”.  An innocent boy died in a tragic accident.  A politician who by all accounts that I could find was trying to make her country a better place was senselessly murdered. 

It’s just…its a lot.  

So, I’ll just leave you with this.  It helped me a little, maybe it will help you: